Friends & Sister wives

Yes I said it. I have sister wives & friends. It started out as a joke but then upon looking at it more closely we’ve found slight differences. I think we all have them in one way or another. Nothing extreme or anything she’s just that supportive shoulder to lean that you click very easily with without hurtful drama; like a sister. Sometimes it can be just one and sometimes it’s a fluid cluster with wives coming and going as the Marine Corps sees fit. This Marine wife can relate to your plight more so than civilians and even your own family sometimes. So you see she’s more than just a typical friend she’s a sister wife.

Friends are great and everyone has lots of them whether they are acquaintance friends, high school facebook friends, twitter follower friends, work friends or neighbor friends. Friends might say hi and ask a rhetoric question expecting an empty answer. You & this friend don’t really have much in common but you’re cordial. A sister wife would know if something is up with you. She tries to pull you out of a funk when the guys leave for training and stops by for coffee to cheer you up every morning. A friend would ask to stop by chit-chat and leave. A sister wife knows your schedule so she drops by & doesn’t have to but will (after coffee of course) help you clean your house before the hubs gets home from out of town just because she knows you’re trying to do 1 million other things. The saying “it takes a village…” applies here but not only with kids because when you’re on the verge of emotional breakdown a sister wife will take your kids for the evening so you can run a warm bubble bath and relax before biting everyone’s heads off. If anything but having a sister wife will give you an excuse to visit your friend in Hawaii when you have to PCS to Arizona.

All of us are in this for a few years and some shorter than others so I see people’s apprehension in getting close to folks you’ll move away from eventually. Like the Marines though your support system is only as strong as those standing to your left and right beside you. Ladies being the only one in your support system is lonely and you’ll need life lines every now and then even if it’s just to vent. Regardless of the wife drama stigma out there please mix and mingle out there with some remarkable new life long Steel Magnolia sister wives.

Allie's story...

Once upon a time in a far away land a young lady named Allie was swept off her feet by a gallant and handsome young Marine by the name of Michael. She knew from the moment she saw him she was in love. Tall, dark and handsome!

Michael began to court Allie and won her affections quickly. He eventually gives her everything she'd ever dreamed of in a home of their own, a vehicle and the luxury of not working since the Marine Corps compensated them decently. She loves him deeply and is devoted and loyal to her man. Through thick and thin of the Marine Corps she stands by him as only a strong and confident Marine wife can. He i a excellent provider, generous and charming lover. They are inseparable and very much in love. Days came and went until she had his child, then another.

Fast forward a bit until right after their last child was born. Somehow their love waned and he eventually spent more time at work than at home and the communication then the relationship suffered. Blame it on work, deployments, stress, maybe undiagnosed PTSD, a midlife crisis, pride or insecurities but either way they grew distant and irritable resenting how this once flourishing relationship has turned into a shell of a marriage. She tried cooking his favorite meals, suggesting vacations, date nights and spicing up their love life. Nothing worked. Michael winced away from all of her efforts in trying to rekindle their once heated and brightly burning flame.

One day Michael told Allie he had enough of the pretending to be in love anymore and he had taken another lover. Allie cried. When her Marine he told her that their love was hollow she cried again. She suggested therapy but he said he did not want to go to counseling and that he didn't see where it could help their situation. He wanted to just part ways...to an extent.

Michael explained that he did not want to get divorced just yet because he wanted to provide medical coverage for his children. Yet he did not want to pay child support either so Allie would have to gain employment quickly to support the children. Her man wanted to bathe another woman in gifts and luxuries so he told Allie to get on her feet and fast. The once loyal and devoted wife melted and complied. Her heart was broken and she was lost. Not only did he crush her financially but emotionally this was more disasterous and cruel. She slowly began to feel as if she'd been taken on a ride and he made her feel like a fool. All of her time and energy and nights waiting for him wasted. Care packages, love notes, tears, anxiety, worrying, keeping his affairs in order, allowing him to splurge money on unncessary things that she could have saved up this entire time if she'd known he was going to drop her like yesterday's newspaper. Allie was more than hurt. The final blow came when Michael gave Allie the common courtesy of notifying her that she is not to get his pension plan and if she tried for it he'd forfeit it.

My question to you is: What would you do? The father of your children you've devoted your young adulthood to is trading you in. Despite his warnings, do you go to JAG and get child support? What about the 401k money and the other lump sum money they get when they retire? What would you do for the betterment of not only your children but all of those years of hard earned dedication to your Marine? Allie devoted years of her life to this man and in a court of law she'd be given her fair share.

This is someone's story and it's unfinished. Michael was her knight in shining armor years ago and has turned controlling, vindictive and manipulative. The ball is in his court and he let's Allie know it is HIS court. So even though Michael has let the sun set on their marriage what should Allie do? Stand and fight or let it be?